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Maybe I Should Quit My Day Job

You know those days when you feel like you’ve got it all together?

It’s been a while since I’ve had one.

Perhaps it’s the post-Christmas slump, or the lack of routine, or PMS, or the winter blues.  All I know is that it often seems like I am scraping through the day and feeling as though I’m failing in virtually every task I’ve been given.  The house is in a perpetual state of disaster; there’s yogurt and baby barf on the ottoman; my cooking skills have been reduced to “place frozen pizza in oven and bake for 25 minutes”;  Avelyn is acting like a wild, rebellious, grumpy bat; Jolie is waking up twice in the night; Avelyn is also waking up once in the night; I NEED SLEEP; I am hungry and my weight loss is at an aggravating stall; I thought I would be better at this whole Stay-At-Home-Mom thing.

Anyone got a nanny to spare?

JAB - Hang in there…we all have those days.

little miss mel - Coming from recent experience, Jolie needs to be 6 months old before you can have any expectations that things should run somewhat smoothly. (And that’s even hard with two kids!! :) ) Routines will/can be formed by then as well.

Until then, HANG IN THERE! You are making GREAT strides every single day. It will get easier. And SOON!

It’s the sleep. It’s always the sleep.

I felt like we were in a better place once Hola reached 4 1/2 months than we were when he was a newborn. Now, at 8 months. SO MUCH EASIER.

You can do it!

LVGurl - My house has been a perpetual disaster since Paige was old enough to get into things. I do my best to keep tidy, but I’ve also learned to lower my expectations for cleanliness in order to survive ;) I have two very busy, very spirited children, both of whom are not *easy*. So I’ve had to loosen up myself to balance things out.

This phase will pass, and you’ll be feeling better soon :)

Rebecca (Bearca) - Hang in there… it WILL get easier. My daughter (second child) slept through the night at 6 months. Before that, I was a total zombie and not very fun to be around! It helps to get out of the house every day, if you can.

And I agree with Little Miss Mel… as the months go by, it gets so much more manageable.

Hillary - You just need some sleep, which of course you know, so I’m not helping. But misery loves company, so if it makes you feel better: A fine layer of dirt is coating my entire house, I am not prepared for The Boy’s birthday party this weekend and I have absolutely no idea how I’m going to stop him from biting.

Chin up.

Angella - You. Me. Mexico. Let’s go.

April Galbraith - Hi Amanda. Caleb just started sleeping through the night at 6 months & even last night I was up twice too. Until now though I’ve felt how you feel every single day. If you can get some sleep it will make the world of difference. I also found if I didn’t think about how much sleep I didn’t have then I was a lot less grumpy. Plus, you know, getting outside, taking vitamin D & B, drinking water, etc all help one to feel better. Also, spending a few minutes in prayer & in the Word helps a lot too. Just read Isaiah 40 in staff meeting last night & at the end it talks about a “new strength” one that wasn’t there before & one that is from God. Remember that somehow when we are weak he is strong & He never grows weary. I, too am just figuring out how that works practically & what that feels like but it must be good as its from Him. Peace. apes.

Sarah - I am right there in the middle of the chaos too.

Marie Green - My experience is that parenting, and familial harmony, go through seasons- somethings things chug along smoothly and everything seems easy and well-balanced, and other times everything is hard and overwhelming and everyone is grumpy and difficult.

These “season” are not related to how good our parenting skills are, or how good of a job we are doing raising nice, polite children. They are just seasons. They wax. They wane. Up. Down. Easy. Hard. Balanced. Unbalanced.

Here’s to a new season for your family soon!

Susie - I haven’t commented in a long while, but I am still reading your mostly halarious blog Amanda. I have no nanny, but wanted to tell you that I too have juice on the carpet, pen on the walls, kids that have been waking up for the day at 4am, and a mountain of laundry. Sometimes we have days… weeks… months like that. Someone told me that those things bother us more when we have no time to ourselves, haven’t eaten something healthy or haven’t gotten enough sleep. Maybe you need to ask Steve if you can take a “sick day”??? I wish we could do that, eh?!?!? Maybe you and your girlfriends escape to the border?

Jen - You are awesome at being a mom, at being a wife, at being a friend. We all have trying times, times where we feel like running away for awhile, times when the house is a mess and we don’t have the energy to do anything about it. This too shall pass.

Love you.

Amanda - Oh I’m so there!! Same boat, really! Ug. I need some sleep!! And I’m so hungry… yet the pounds are at a stand still.

Elizabeth - Don’t lose hope. Things will be better soon, I’m sure. Thinking of you!!

Danica - As long as you post on the blog regularly and feed the kids anything at all, then you’re doing well in my books.
Having two kids of those two ages is exhausting. And the weather sucks. Everything will get better in time. God Bless!

Mrs. Wilson - I’m sorry you’re struggling! I want to say “It’ll get better” but I hate it when people tell me that, so I’ll just say, um, hang in there?

Also, I’ve heard that sleep deprivation does not help with weight loss. I’m not sure if that’s comforting or angering.

melanie - Oh my – do I ever hear you today! I have actually been looking at job boards and daycare thinking “anything has to be easier than this!” And I only have the one child. I find it is getting harder as she gets older – not the opposite like everyone is promising. Maybe it is because I’m sick.

christy - Yes, I’ll be there in a week.

Amy Q - I am also needing a nanny. And I only have one child driving me crazy. I am seriously feeling the January blahs myself…hang in there. It gets better (so I’ve been told)

Teresa - I just found out my friend is hiring a live-in nanny, with a 3-year contract.

I am so jealous. Wouldn’t that be the best?

margaret - Amanda, I just wanted to say how much I admire you. Although we’ve never met, I’ve been pretty religious about reading your blog through my sister-in-laws page (Susan McCallum) and I think you’re one of the funniest most dedicated moms ever. I also think you’re way too hard on yourself especially about your weight because you are very beautiful inside and out. I bet you just need a day where you can go shopping, get your nails done, hang out with some good friends without the kids and scarf down some ice cream without feeling guilty. Follow that with a long hot bubble bath and an early night in bed and you’ll be on top of the world once again. And why wouldn’t you be…you have two beautiful little girls and it seems a whole bunch of wonderful friends who love and support you. Some times it’s worth the money to get a babysitter for the day or to let someone take over loving your children for a night so you can have some time to refresh. Thanks for letting me look into your life, a life I find beautiful even when it doesn’t seem so “pretty”.

Michele - Hang in there! Things will get better!

Kim - I only have one myself, but when the going gets tough, I focus on the long-term picture. Someday, I’ll have two (maybe three!?!) kiddos who are in elementary school. At that glorious age when they WANT to please us, and are fairly self-sufficient. (soon to be followed by the smart a$$ middle school days tho) I know these days will go by quick enough.
And the weight loss thing – do what you feel you must, but your ‘before’ weight would be my GOAL. :)

Just Jiff - Hang in there! It’s definitely always the sleep that gets us all. You need a day or two for someone to watch the kids. Day 1: you sleep UNITERRUPTED. As in, drop kids off at daycare or a sitter and go home and take Benadryl and sleep ALL DAY. Get up only when it’s time to get the kids back. Day 2: sleep in, clean house and get laundry as caught up as possible. If you can afford to, take it to a cleaners and have them launder and fold/put on hangers for you. Just pick up and be done. If you can afford it, have someone come in this ONCE and clean your house from top to bottom. Go to the spa while this is being done. lol.

If that’s not possible (cause it’s not for me. lol) then take a deep breath, don’t worry about things not being perfect/clean, etc. and do whatever it takes to keep your sanity otherwise.

Laurell - Listen, I support that whole Mexico thing. You’ve got a sitter right here! ;)

steph h. - i admit that i fed my daughter microwave popcorn and ice cream for lunch on more than one occasion this past fall (while i was practically passed out with morning sickness). carbs and calcium, kept my kid alive, right?! you do what you have to do.
your mothering inspires me as i am preggers with baby girl 2 due this spring.
hang in there. (i’m a pasty white girl- but when not pregnant- my mommy getaway was a short tanning session. 15 minute break, no crying kid, silence, dose of vitamin D, you can even sleep for a couple of those minutes…)