A wild gust of wind swept through the orchard and pitched our trampoline into the sky, then dropped it with a mighty thump, rendering it a crumped heap of springs and bars.
Then while at a playdate at Angella’s house yesterday I noticed a peculiar expression of concentration on Jolie’s face as she sat on the floor playing with toys. I walked over to her, suspecting she was working on a poop, when I saw the green, steaming lava spewing out the back of her jeans onto the ONE rug in Ange’s living room. A pile of hot turd, a child covered in her own feces, a frantic mother searching for wipes. Ah, the life of leisure.
I thought the fecal eruption was just a fluke, a one-time deal. Ha! How I was mistaken. For the rest of the day my poor girl had diarrhea the likes of which I have never seen (nor smelled). It got worse as the day went on, she had no appetite, she ralfed all over the ottoman, she developed a fever. I thought perhaps she had caught a strain of what had plagued Avelyn last week.
So I took her to the clinic, waited for an hour to see a doctor who told me it was viral and got sent home empty-handed. She (and I) had a rough night and I netted abour four hours of sleep. Today her spirits are high but her turd is still a toxic slime, spraying out of the back of her diaper like a firehose all over the nearest carpeted area. How I long for hardwood floors.
Anyways, I know that barfing and diarrhea, while inconveniences, are nothing compared to the truly terrible health ailments out there. But COME ON! I’ve had enough of the poop!
18 Comments
I believe THIS should be the nationwide Pandemic scare right now … not the Swine Flu! My household is running rampant with the poop/puke fest. My oldest daughter, God Bless her heart, between gallbladder, pregnancy, gallbladder again, spent the past 13 months living a life of puke. She had her baby, finally had the gallbladder removed, and thought or at least hoped she would never see puke again. Last week Lil Man picked up the bug, Lil Bit had it over the weekend, and of everyone else in my house my oldest daughter picked up her share of it yesterday and last night. Two more to go and hopefully then we will all be immune!
Fever + Poop + Puke = TOTAL MISERY … And they say Swine Flu is bad!! How dare they?!
I can testify that it was some of the stankiest poop I have ever encountered.
That’s lame that she’s sick, though. No wonder she wasn’t her usual self yesterday. Poor baby. And you.
Hope she’s better fast; give her a cuddle for me.
I have so been there!
Awww. Poor little Jolie. Poop messes are the least fun.
Oh man. That definitely stinks (pun intended. heh).
Hope she gets better soon.
And you both get some much needed sleep!
AHHH! It never ends. Both of us sleep deprived, both of us with sick kids. It’s gotta stop!
“I’ve had enough of the poop,” is a potential title for my autobiography.
Oh goodness. I don’t mean to take pleasure in your terrible misfortune but your post had me laughing out loud….Unfortunately, I can relate all too well to the horrors of volcano-like poop spewing out the back of the diaper. It happened to us Thanksgiving weekend in 2006 at my stepmom’s in Ontario. Lorelei was so poopy I literally said screw the wipes and put her under a running tap in the tub. Hope little Jolie is feeling not so shitty today…LOL. Hugs to you.
We have just been there and ugh, care not to go back anytime soon. It was when I declared that my favorite possession was a my Hoover Carpet Steam Cleaner, that, damn, I sure am a full on Mom now!
I agree! This has got to stop! First my older son got it, the my husband, then my father, then the baby, and now me. My daughter has escaped so far. Praying the rest of your household escapes, too.
Have you ever thought of calling the BC nurses line when one of your girls ( or you!) have something going on? It will save you time from going to a clinic and waiting around. Just an idea ….from a RN.. happy nurses week to us!
Oh my. I’m so sorry!! I hope she’s better soon!! (For your sake AND hers!)
Well that just stinks (stupid pun intended)!
I was just talking to another mom friend and she was asking if C had ever had rotavirus, her description sounds a lot like what you’ve got going on. She said the poop was so smelly she had to sit in the house with all the doors and windows open in the dead of winter.
Hoping she makes a quick recovery!
Good on you for sticking in there and having such a great attitude! I think I may have just tied a plastic bag around my kid’s waist and been done with it. Okay, maybe not…
Pet peeve: going to the doctor’s office, sitting in a waiting room full of people sicker than me, paying a co-pay, only to have the doctor tell me, “Yep! Nothing I can do! Wait it out!” SO annoying.
I hope the rest of your week is less explosive.
I was eating greenbeans while reading this – ugh! Hope she’s doing better now.
Ugh. I hope she’s feeling better soon, poor little one!
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