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Third Time Barfy

Having been lucky enough to dodge the morning sickness bullet with my first two pregnancies, I used to think that women who suffered from it were kind of just being whiney. Alas, since the morning of my sixth week I have been feeling like a big ol’ bag of stale barf that’s waiting to spill out onto the carpet and it is even more miserable that those whiney women said it was. Trying to keep a household running and two children alive and tended to, when all I feel like doing is sobbing in a heaving, wretching ball of bile on the couch, is actually kind of horrid. Blech. Maybe this means I’m having a boy. Or twins (bite your tongue!).

Most days I wonder how I will possibly cope with one more crazy kid running around, when my hands already feel so full.

And I have been fighting a lot of fear regarding this pregnancy: fear of miscarriage, fear of having a child with special needs, fear of something going wrong with the delivery. I know there’s no use dwelling on those fears, but in my heart I do feel like three healthy kids is just too much to ask for sometimes, you know? Whatever will be, will be, though, and all I can do is be thankful for the moments we’re in, even if they’re exhausting or (literally) nauseating or scary at times.

C @ Kid Things - I don’t know where I’ve been, but I had no idea you were pregnant. Congratulations!!

I have 3 healthy, gorgeous kids and I still thank my lucky stars every day for that. There’s also a very small part of me that is still waiting for the other shoe to drop.

Jess - You sound like me. My first two pregnancies I had no sickness (and gained a good 50 lbs with each to show for it). And then this one?

Puked five times a day for 20 weeks. This baby hates me.

And my first two? Perfect. No allergies, no congenital anything, blah blah blah…and I have worried every single day with this pregnancy that I’m too blessed to be blessed again.

So I totally understand where you’re at.

april galbraith - Hey, are you back in your house? Are you going to post reno pics if you are? How long did it take to get pregnant this time? I remember the other two were right away after deciding not to “prevent” what might happen. Congrats by the way! I’m hoping its a boy for you!

kakaty - I was much sicker the 2nd time around but it usually passed before my daughter woke up for the morning. However, the absolute worst moment was when I was on my knees heaving into the toilet and M (who is the same age as Avelyn) came into the bathroom and started rubbing my back and asking worriedly if I was okay; the noise had woken her up. It was so sweet but it made me so sad that she had to witness it (because, my god I was so, so sick every damn morning). Shortly thereafter she started spitting in the toilet to imitate me – ha!.

But it all went away around week 14 (and came back weeks 21 & 22 – but THAT’S over). Hope yours does, too!

steff - your third miracle must be a BOY! :-)

Ashley - I so know how the barfies feel! The other thing I forgot to mention on FB is that sour candies and mint gum helped too. Right when I was in mid heave (because the meds helped but I’d still randomly heave read: “Hey Amanda *heave* what’s happenin’?” not so good) if I could get something mint in my mouth it’d stop.

As for the fear, I just finished Max Lucado’s Fearless. AMAZING. I have never read a book written more for me, that had me reaching for my bible and a highlighter about every second page. The “fears” are something I struggle with and this book gave me some crazy good perspective. And it wasn’t really tear jerker fashion, or boring as many books can be!

Hope you’re feeling better soon!

laurie - I wasn’t sick a minute with Reid. I then couldn’t figure out why I was sick with this pregnancy…and why my pants no longer fit at 6 weeks.

And well, you know the answer to that one.

Hello, twins!

Jill Wiens - Simon came with a whole host of interesting congenital problems. I knew about them at 21 weeks. God’s given us the grace and peace to deal with them. He also gave Simon some cool medical cures.
I had NO sickness at all. I don’t think there’s a link.

Sam - I understand what you are saying Amanda, in both my third and fourth pregnancies I would get myself worked up because the idea of three, and then four, perfectly normal, healthy kids seemed too much. But our four girls, while often a challenge, are healthy and lovely and we’re incredibly blessed. And will you continue to be too. I hope the nausea stops soon.

margaret - As you know Amanda, my twin pregnancy was complicated after finding out our son suffered from a serious congenital heart defect at my twenty week scan. He had open heart surgery at three days old and then died on the sixth day. It hurt like hell and it still does. That said, I wouldn’t change a thing (other than to have a happier outcome). Calvin’s six days in our lives were precious and filled with love. Having to deal with a child that had a life threatening defect changed me and the way I look at things. You are extremely blessed to have two healthy girls, as am I. I don’t believe that anything will happen to you and your pregnancy but if it does, you will deal with it. It’s amazing how our strength is pushed to the limit for those we love the most and how we can be capable of dealing with things we never thought possible. You are a strong, loving woman and no matter what, you CAN deal with whatever hand you are dealt. I think you should know that high levels of HCG which produces morning sickness, is considered a sign of a healthy pregnancy. Try to relax, there is nothing that can be done at this point in your pregnancy anyways. Have faith that your body knows what to do and that you are young and healthy. Sending you hugs

Kristin - Ugh! Sorry to hear you’re feeling yucky. I am 20 weeks PG with #2 and was much sicker this time. I am currently 15 lbs lighter this pregnancy than I was at the same point the first time around! It let up around 14 weeks or so but man, I would never be able to do this again!
Here’s to a short-lived bout of morning (all-day) sickness for you!

Jenn - These are also the thoughts that float through my head as I contemplate having a third child. Also, I just assume that everyone will think I am trying for a girl since I already have 2 boys! Can’t please myself, can’t please my mother.
In any case, congrats on the third. You have inspired me to rethink my thoughts. Thanks
Jenn

Andrea Firmani - I too was all, ‘there must be something wrong’ with the pregnancy with my son, and for most of the pregnancy. I guess it didn’t help that I am a LDR RN and I see all things on the spectrum of baby and I also have a wild imagination and keen sense of worry.

My husband kept threatening to block out all search engines from my lap top as I would look up everything weird and crazy that I had either seen at work or heard of. However, I always had the deep down feeling that things would be okay and healthy and a mothers instinct is something I believe in.

Hope you have some barfy free moments in your days.

Trish - Oh my most happy and healthy wishes are with you and the new baby! Rest easy and take care xoxo

Ashley - Congratulations! I enjoy reading your blog. I just thought I would share that when I was pregnant with #3, I had a lot of those same fears and concerns. My Dr. said it is quite common with woman having more than 2 children. It is as though you feel like already have 2 healthy children so how could you possibly manage to have another. He also said that statistically you have less chance of having difficulties because you and your husband have shown that you are genetically compatible to make babies. I am now pregnant with #4 and still worry from time to time but I just try and trust and pray and know that no matter what, God is in control and everything will work out for the best.

Meg - I’ll be sending many positive thoughts your way!!!!

Mama Bear - Best advice I ever got regarding my “all day” morning sickness was to eat every 15 minutes, faithfully. Nothing big, just enough so you had something in your stomach: a few bites of yogurt, quarter of a graham cracker, 2 bites of banana (gross!), handful of cereal, teddy grahams, cracker and peanut butter. You get the picture. Plus mints, sour candies and mint gum all help, along with the smell of lemon. I wish you luck. I have 3, all are (mostly) healthy, it happens, and it’s a blessing.

Tamara - I agree with the advice to have a little something in your stomach all of the time. I never felt as sick as you have been feeling, but I do remember that it was the worst when my stomach was empty. Also, it’s such a vicious cycle. You’re sick when you’re empty but then you don’t feel like eating so you stay empty.

The comment about the pants no longer fitting at 6 weeks and the barfing after not barfing during her previous pregnancy…… It totally makes me think you have two in there!

Heidi - don’t sweat the pants not fitting. My pants didn’t fit at 6wks either with the 3rd. I was afraid to go to the Dr for my first appt at 10wks because I was so much bigger than with the others and was sure there were 2. Nope only one and by 20wks I was no bigger than with the others. Good luck. As for the fear…I think back to what Pastor Larry said a few weeks ago…where there is fear, God isn’t. You will have what God intends, just rest in that. ln my opinion the 3rd child is the easiest.

Lisa - I totally know how you feel about being paranoid and worrying about this pregnancy! I’m 25 weeks with my 2nd and I felt the same way during my first trimester. For whatever reason it felt like I couldn’t possibly be blessed enough to have a 2nd perfectly healthy pregnancy and baby. But, everything looks fine so far! I hope those feelings settle down for you as your pregnancy goes on as well! Good luck! Your girls are beautiful!

Elizabeth - I can relate to this 100% from my pregnancy with Sawyer. Praying for you… may it get better soon!!

Abby - Sorry you’re feelin so yucky (but I do love your descriptions)..worries are normal. And hey..my mom had 9 totally healthy kids..it’s do-able. Buck up, trooper! :)

Jerilyn - Just wanted to say, that I know how you feel about the fear of a healthy baby #3. I was already blessed with two beautiful, healthy children…could it happen again? Of course, it did and #3 is now a dynamite two year old…but I’m not willing to roll the dice again for a #4 :-). Prayers for you and smoother pregnancy and a healthy new baby.

Marilyn - I remember the fear. Worries are normal (but still not nice to experience). Just remember that it usually works out fine. I hope you’re feeling better soon!

Sarah - Ugh. I didn’t have morning sickness too bad, but I do remember some of the barfy moments. It helped if I ate continuously and never let myself get too hungry. It also helped if I didn’t eat too much at one time. I ate a lot of pretzels and cheese (together). Hope you’re feeling better soon!

Navigating the Mothership - Life is not happy when viewed through puke-colored glasses. Hang in there! How far along are you?

Kerri Anne - I have a dear friend who gets the Crazy Morning Sickness with each pregnancy (she’s just 11 or so weeks along with her third right now!) and it’s The Suck. Hang in there babe and just keep remembering the smell of mushy baby head. Mmmm, mushy baby head.