I am not a puker. The only times I have thrown up in the past decade are when I got a concussion and while I was in labour. I have the stomach of a horse. So it must have been one killer flu bug that ravaged my body a few nights back because I barfed, and I barfed good. Because I so rarely puke, I never know if my body is actually going to upchuck or not, so after writhing on the couch for an hour at 2 am on Wednesday morning I got up to find some ginger ale in the kitchen and while I was treading to the fridge I felt an urgent rising in my throat and barely made it to the kitchen sink in time to spew a couple litres of spicy, butter chicken barf. Nast-ee. I felt like I was dying. Choking and sputtering and gasping for breath as my body lurched with fresh heaves until I was empty. I am so glad I am not someone who barfs often, and I hope it’s at least another decade before I have to do it again.
About an hour after I vomited, Steve followed suit and then proceeded to dry heave for the next four hours. (He totally wins the Academy Award for Most Dramatic Heaver. Seriously, he woke up the whole house.) We eventually took him to the hospital, it was so bad. They gave him some anti-nausea medication through an IV and he came home a few hours later not feeling much better.
For the next 24 hours we both laid in bed, sharing in the misery. It hurt just to LAY THERE. I just wanted to crawl out of my skin. Avelyn had been barfing, off and on, for the past 3 days too. Our steam cleaner was working overtime and I was cursing the fact we don’t have hardwood floors.  I had always half-joked that I wanted to get the flu so I could lose a few pounds, but this experience has made me eat those words. And they tasted like regurgitated butter chicken.
Anyways, 24 hours passed and now I am so thankful to just feel normal again. I take good health for granted every single day until it disappears. It’s pretty awesome not to puke.
While it was kind of great timing to have my family here while we were so sick, so they could tend to Avelyn, it’s becoming more and more ridiculous the things that go wrong when they come to visit. Someone always ends up sick, or our orchard gets destroyed by hail and we have to fish muddy furniture out of a flooded crawl space, or Avelyn is extra grumpy for reasons NOT KNOWN TO MAN.
(She is slowly perfecting the Art of the Tantrum these days. So far she’s got back-arching, shrill screaming, and limpifying [you know? when a kid just makes their whole body go dead-weight and you can’t even really pick them up?] down pat. Next week she plans to tackle vicious kicking and arm flailing.)
 Anyways, for now we are all feeling restored and looking forward to an early Christmas gift exchange with my family tonight.
Stay healthy, everyone!
19 Comments
Aww, man, a whole house full of sickies! I lost 5 pounds in 2 days when I had the stomach flu last year. You are so right; it hurt just to lie in bed. Glad you’re feeling normal again!
I’m glad you’re better. And that your Momma was here to help :)
Also?
I think Matthew is in the running for the Academy Award for Most Dramatic Heaver.
I have never heard him be so UNBELIEVABLY LOUD in all of the years that I have known him.
So glad you are feeling better. I’m sure it will be a long while before you can eat butter chicken again!!! As for the tantrums, I remember 18months to 26months like it was yesterday. I had to remove Brooklyn from Orchard park in a huge tantrum, holding her facing forward as she flailed and kicked. And to think someone at the courtesy desk had the nerve to comment on how red my face was! When you are in the middle of it the stage seems to last forever but it does get better (or maybe just different) Have a great Christmas with your family!!!
That sounds terrible. Keep that bug up there in Canada.
It is so hard when you feel that sick AND you have a child (or children) to take care of. They don’t stop just because you need to lay in bed.
I’m glad you’re on the mend now!
Glad to hear you’re all on the mend, poor things!
Sounds awful!!! Glad to hear you’re doing a bit better! Have fun with your Christmas exchange!
Glad you’re feeling better. Noooo fun.
Glad to hear it has passed!
Aw man! Lousy timing. It does seem like whenever you are reunited with your family something goes wrong. Like every time you come here Avelyn gets an ear infection.
I’m glad you guys are feeling better and can enjoy the last half of your family’s stay!
You are the third blogger that I have read to be suffering the evil stomach of doom in the last couple of days. My own trial with it started this morning about 2am, minus the day of “egg burping” I did yesterday. I’m hoping mine only lasts 24 hours *sighs*
Glad you’re feeling better. And happy holidays to you and yours.
Ugh. Thanks for the details. I wish you a puke-free Christmas holiday.
Hm. I’m thankful for my health. And the fact that I did not eat butter chicken today. I love butter chicken, as mentioned before, but as of now, I cannot bring myself to eat it. Because of reading this. I’ll get over it. Thanks for sharing. Have fun opening gifts!!!
Glad to hear that all of you are feeling better! And yes, it seems like the fury of toddlerhood lasts forever. But it passes. My kids had more than one foaming at the mouth fit at that age. And most of them in public!
Oh my goodness! That all just sounds horrid! I’m on Van Island and it’s the same story here – everyone is getting it. At least it only came out one hole – apparently some are having both! YUCK! Aren’t you glad I shared that?
BTW – I made your chocolate chip cookie balls dipped in melted chocolate! OHHHHHHH SOOOOOOOO GOOOOOOD! Thanks for the recipe!
Glad everyone is healthy now and you can enjoy a Very Merry Christmas!
Limpifying.
That’s terrific.
My 2 year old is very good at limpifying.
I am so glad you are now on the flip side of the evil bug. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to eat anything that has the words ‘buttered chicken’ ever again, but that is probably a good thing.
Merry Christmas!
Sounds awful. I’m glad it’s all past. Yuk.
Hope you have a restful holiday.
(And one of my favorite children’s writers calls it “Going boneless.” Love it.)
Amanda….I know it sucks to be sick, but I must say your descriptions of it make for a really good read. I’m behind so I’m late in catching up on your prior entries.
So sorry you guys were sick..but I know you are all better now!!!
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