I lead a charmed life and I know it. There isn’t much I am justified in griping about, but every now and again I get mopey and angsty and huffy anyways. The other day I was just feeling tired of the adult responsibilities that have been thrust at me in the past 10 years. Gone are my days of adolescent freedom. Now I have to work, I have to clean the house, I have to budget our meagre funds, I have to chase after a kid whose highlight of her day is laughing when I say, “No, do not stick your finger in the electrical socket.” And sometimes it just makes me tired. I feel bad saying that. I work ONE DAY A WEEK. There are single moms out there working full-time nights to feed their kids and I am complaining about my busy, responsibility-laden lifestyle. What a whiner. But aren’t we all entitled to the occasional “I feel kind of down” day? I think so. And I’m actually not feeling down today; that was yesterday. I’m so over it (hello, Mood Swing, nice to meet you!) and am so past it that I am deeply pondering and reflecting upon it here on my most revered blog.
A lot of my initial mopeyness stemmed from Weight Watchers, actually. I am sick and tired of eating healthily. I know it’s only been a month and, c’mon I’ve lost weight and feel good (minus the gas) but I am already weary of counting every single point and wondering if the family whose house we’re having dinner at will be serving something I can eat and maybe I should sneak some lettuce leaves into my pocket and eat them in the bathroom so I won’t wilt but all I really want to do it buy a dozen donuts and sit in my car all by myself and down them quickly….aaaaaaaahhhhh!
I am tired of having to be disciplined: about what I eat, what I spend my money on, and how I use my time. I want to be like Avelyn and have someone carry me around all day and feed me biscuits and tell me to nap and give me juice. Oh, to be a child again.
But then I got to thinking about how a child, despite how unbelievabley good she’s got it, can still find things to be grumpy about. Like today when I was trying to go for a nice, long walk with my girl and she was freaking out the entire time. I wanted to whack her upside the head and shriek, “Look, we’re HAVING FUN, OK?! There’s sunshine in the sky, a bottle of juice for you to suck on, a cracker in your greedy paw and all you have to do is sit in your stroller as I push you up this steep hill while my quads ignite. So quit your moaning and ENJOY THIS!”
 Perhaps it’s simply human nature to blindly pass by the good and focus on our discomforts?
All I know is that yesterday when I caved and used a few too many flex points (read: the whole week’s worth) on a three foot-long cheesy breadstick and a chocolate bar, I felt much better and now have a renewed desire to pursue the discipline I had previously resented.
13 Comments
Oh boy, could I have written this myself :) I feel the same way sometimes but am so glad the feelings pass and I do realize how unbelievably fortunate I am. Have a great night!
Why is disciplined living so stifling? I know exactly what you mean. For me, currently, it’s the time management issue – I am so annoyed at having to do the right thing at the right time all the time. Why can’t I just lay around and read magazines and take naps?
YES! Exactly. I concur.
I, too, get tired of responsibility some days my friend. Those are the days when you need to be flexible a little (and use FLEX points) in order to stay sane. Good on you for doing so :)
I am QUEEN of hating responsibilites…I know how you feel. I think you deserve to go have a greasy poutine…it’s much less expensive than therapy!
I’m delurking long enough to tell you this post was inspiring to me and one of my favorites I’ve read on this site thus far. Blue days are inevitable… the key is to be mature enough to have some chocolate one day while not letting that choice dictate how you’re going to feel about yourself the next day.
xoxo
amen sister.
No matter how lucky I know I am, I still have those days. We all do and as long as we are able to bounce back and appreciate what we have it is absolutely fine to whine about all your responsibilities. I do it more often than I should, but at the end of the day I know I am one lucky lady.
I hope you enjoyed the breadstick and chocolate bar, you deserve them!
Your definitely not alone in how you feel..I had one of those day’s yesterday. Thanks for being so honest!
Yep, the grass IS always greener! No matter where you’re at in life, wherever you were at in a “simpler” time seems so much easier. I think it’s human nature to feel the way you do right now. And low blood sugar ;)
Everyone has blue days and the best part is having friends to share them with. No one is perfect, hence no one’s life is perfect either.
Can I join you for a dozen donuts in the car?
Oh I just HAVE to comment on this one. Is it wrong blog etiquette to not comment on the most recent post? (I’m sorry that I don’t read everyday so I missed this one when it first came out.)
I know EXACTLY how you feel. I did LA Weight Loss for two months and I HATED it. I lost 10 pounds so that I liked, but the whole obssessiveness about what you’re eating really got to me. Now that I’m off it, I still eat really good but it’s on MY terms, not because I have to to stay on plan. Six pounds in one month is AWESOME!
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